Heavy Sighs
Question:
I hope no one minds — I’m reposting this, because near as I can tell, it never went through. If it’s a duplicate, please excuse me. Thanks!
Well I never saw the first posting so I’m glad you sent this caquse I can relate all too well…. <snipped I’ve been having one of my bad-depression days. If you don’t want to read this, go ahead and skip it. I won’t know, so you won’t be hurting my feelings :)
as far as I’m concerned that is one of the MOST importnat times to post….i’m listening so let’s talk! In addition to my headaches, the last year or so has just been hell. I lost my job a year ago August because I was absent too often, due primarily to migraines,<snipped rest of job history
okay I’m probably going to get flamed for this, but you job history sounds like mine did a few years back and coming from experience I’m just wondering if you’ve tried applying for social security or at least SSI? If you haven’t you should get the ball rolling now. Believe it or not your job history plays a lot into it in a lot of ways…not only does it determine the amount you may get but it also shows that due to the disabilities you are unable to keep a job. Hey I know it’s tough thing to do…but believe me if I can survive the paperwork any one can…I’ll even help you if you want. I haven’t been approved yet…they still have two more months to deicde but I’ve been jumping through their hoops an awful lot. let me know if you want some help. I’d started treatment with a local pain clinic, but we’re STILL (even now) in the trial and error stages, so my HA’s are pretty frequent (at least weekly, if not more, lasting 3 – 5 days at a time).
that in my opinion is almost as bad as the pain itself…you never know if somethings going to work or not and you have to just sit and wit and see…. I hope they do find the magic combination for you. <snipped again In July, I was hired for a permanent job, only to be fired after 6 weeks. I was not in any kind of violation of any of their policies (that I know of), and I was never really given a reason. They agreed not to dispute my unemployment benefits, however, so I didn’t press for much more.
They don’t have to really give a reason. been there, Done that. In addition to my HA’s, I have several other problems: <snipped again
see you are dealing with a lot here….take it easy on yourself. no wonder you’re depressed… On top of all that, because I’ve been out of work so long, we’re constantly having money crises, though so far it’s not gotten so bad that anything has been repossessed nor have we been called into court.
SSI won’t help out a lot financially, BUT it will help out some and some is better than none right? I do have some GOOD things in my life — mainly my husband, my 2 dogs and my cat (which are our kids). My husband is not domesticated or disciplined, but he’s still the greatest.
It’s good that you have a supportive husband…you are very lucky. tell him thank you from me!<snipped but I gotta say wow he’s romantice too! Anyway, I’m just having a real bad day today. My head is feeling like a doozy is due any minute, and the Midrin isn’t doing anything, and the Ultram is barely reducing my knee pain, so I doubt it’ll do much for a HA if it does come on full bore. I’m also just feeling kind of useless, because there is SO little I can do right now. I’m dumping here because I always dump on my husband, and he really needs a break.
I think the useless part is what gets to me the most. I have a lot of mobility problems at times too… and I can relate to the useless feeling all to well. Thanks for taking the time to read this. Just knowing there are people out there who can understand the helplessness, frustration, anger and sadness than chronic pain (and HA’s in particular) can bring, who still manage to go on with their lives, helps me greatly.
or at least attempt to go on…. doesn’t always feel like I succeed in that one but hey I try… Karen http://www.softcom.net/users/wavsrus/karen.html you might want to check out the migraines and the fibromaylgia pages…. it might help a little
Response:
I hope no one minds — I’m reposting this, because near as I can tell, it never went through. If it’s a duplicate, please excuse me. Thanks! – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi there… I know I’m kinda new to the list, but if you don’t mind, I need to vent a bit. I’ve been having one of my bad-depression days. If you don’t want to read this, go ahead and skip it. I won’t know, so you won’t be hurting my feelings :) In addition to my headaches, the last year or so has just been hell. I lost my job a year ago August because I was absent too often, due primarily to migraines, but there were a few other things as well. The department had a very strict attendance policy, and I just couldn’t survive it. It was probably just as well, because the company had been sold 3 times in the previous 18 months, and was getting ready to go out of business, so I would have lost the job either way. Between September and March, I worked at a variety of temporary jobs — two of them were to have been long term (6 months or more), but in each case, I was let go after 3 months due to absences, again due mostly to headaches. I’d started treatment with a local pain clinic, but we’re STILL (even now) in the trial and error stages, so my HA’s are pretty frequent (at least weekly, if not more, lasting 3 – 5 days at a time). I had been on propranolol, which was helping incredibly (only about 1 HA per month), but my regular doctor is taking me off of that to see if we can do anything about the severe fatigue I’ve been suffering with. (I’ve been having serious trouble staying awake at jobs when I’ve tried working, and when I’m home, I pretty much have had to nap every afternoon.) Withdrawing the propranolol seems to be helping the fatigue, but my HA’s are getting worse again. In July, I was hired for a permanent job, only to be fired after 6 weeks. I was not in any kind of violation of any of their policies (that I know of), and I was never really given a reason. They agreed not to dispute my unemployment benefits, however, so I didn’t press for much more. In addition to my HA’s, I have several other problems: sleep apnea (treated with CPAP, with fairly good success), severe osteoarthritis in both knees, with one getting significantly worse (I now have to use a cane, and can only walk about 100 feet before the pain gets too great), Tourette’s Syndrome (a mild case, mostly an annoyance, but still something to be dealt with), Irritable Bowel Syndrome (ick!), clinical depression (this was a problem BEFORE all this other stuff started! — it’s medicated, but even that can’t fight everything…), lower back pain (part of why it’s so hard to walk) and a lifelong battle with my weight (despite the pain I have, I’ve had to give up dieting because of problems with yo-yoing, and a lot of my weight is related to my low thyroid and the obsessive-compulsive aspects of Tourette’s. I can’t take any of the meds for Tourette’s because either they don’t mix well with my anti-depressants, or I cannot tolerate the side effects). I think that’s everything. On top of all that, because I’ve been out of work so long, we’re constantly having money crises, though so far it’s not gotten so bad that anything has been repossessed nor have we been called into court. I do have some GOOD things in my life — mainly my husband, my 2 dogs and my cat (which are our kids). My husband is not domesticated or disciplined, but he’s still the greatest. Because of my knees, back and HA’s, it is hard for me to do much of anything around the house. Not only does he work 40 hours a week, he gets all our meals (very simple stuff, little actual "cooking" involved), keeps the house clean and so forth. Sometimes he doesn’t get stuff done as quickly as I’d like, but the fact that he gets it done is what counts. He’s also VERY romantic, very affectionate, exceptionally patient, an willing to love me for me, with all of my aches and pains, with all of my troubles getting jobs, and even with my being a large woman (he used to hate the idea of dating someone overweight, but he changed his mind when he realized that he wanted someone just like me, but had never thought of taking me out because of my size. He decided that was silly, and changed his perspective. THAT’S what I call **LOVE**). My dogs are adorable, affectionate, great company and constantly make me laugh. I need the humour they bring like you wouldn’t believe (well, actually you probably would!), and my cat is just sweet. Anyway, I’m just having a real bad day today. My head is feeling like a doozy is due any minute, and the Midrin isn’t doing anything, and the Ultram is barely reducing my knee pain, so I doubt it’ll do much for a HA if it does come on full bore. I’m also just feeling kind of useless, because there is SO little I can do right now. I’m dumping here because I always dump on my husband, and he really needs a break. Thanks for taking the time to read this. Just knowing there are people out there who can understand the helplessness, frustration, anger and sadness than chronic pain (and HA’s in particular) can bring, who still manage to go on with their lives, helps me greatly. Griselda — "I am become grey…. I stand between the darkness and the light… …between the candle and the star." — Delenn, Babylon 5 "Great! My secret weapon is PMS!" – BtVS FOC-L Todd’s Smile FOC Nora – Keeper of Her Mood Swings and Hormonal Irrationality
Response:
griselda.. hope this helps in a little way.. sending you a .. ((((((((BIG HUG)))))))) ronnie queen of hugs
Response:
(CKnow2621) writes: I started work about 2 months ago and it is tough to keep it up, even though I only work 4 hrs.a day. And all the meds do take their toll, don’t they? With sansert it was like having the flue. Now I am taking periactin and not sure what it will do to me. I have clinical depression too and take Zoloft. I take flexeril at night for TMJ.
I can tell you that the meds you’re taking can really make super tired. Especially if you’re adding flexeril at night. I (we) know where you’re at. Hell, I even felt tired after a nap!!!! A couple of thoughts…. 1.Try not taking the flexeril until it’s time to share the proverbial cigarette, so to speak. 2. Try to find some time when you’re feeling the best. Mornings? Afternoon? Before dinner? 3. But, if you’re just not in the mood, with all these meds, don’t beat yourself up over this one too!! We all hate the fact that this disease takes away so much of our lives, and how much it effects those around us. You have to remember that this is a disease, not a choice, and you’re doing the best you can to fight not only the disease, but also the side effects from the meds. 4. It’s not always just about sex. It’s alot about just missing being close. Quiet time together. Ya know, when we feel at our best, we try our best to run around and catch up on all the chores we’ve been passing on. Let the dishes pile up for a couple of extra hours,( or even overnite (gasp)), go out and rent "Love Story" and catch up on a couple of cuddles. Bob
Response:
Griselda, I’m just glad that you felt comfortable enough to "dump" on us! Sometimes the ng is the only place to go! And that’s okay. Keep on dumping! MB
Response:
(and then of course I snipped it all up!) – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I do have some GOOD things in my life — mainly my husband, my 2 dogs and my cat (which are our kids). My husband is not domesticated or disciplined, but he’s still the greatest. He’s also VERY romantic, very affectionate, exceptionally patient, an willing to love me for me, with all of my aches and pains, with all of my troubles getting jobs, and even with my being a large woman (he used to hate the idea of dating someone overweight, but he changed his mind when he realized that he wanted someone just like me, but had never thought of taking me out because of my size. He decided that was silly, and changed his perspective. THAT’S what I call **LOVE**). Thanks for taking the time to read this. Just knowing there are people out there who can understand the helplessness, frustration, anger and sadness than chronic pain (and HA’s in particular) can bring, who still manage to go on with their lives, helps me greatly. Griselda
Hi Griselda, I am glad that you have found the ng for support. This is definitely the right place to come! And yes, most of us all do understand the helplessness, frustration, anger and sadness that chronic pain can bring. I think we all need to know there are others out there living similar lives to help us go on in our own daily struggles. I am so happy that you have such an understanding and loving husband. You are very, very lucky in that aspect. Hope you are feeling better soon. Joan :)))))))
