Understanding
Question:
I have TS and am blessed with three children. The youngest has TS, but much milder than mine. Since I was not diagnosed until after they were all born, I did not have this decision to make. However, knowing what I do now, I would still have children. My son with TS is well adjusted professional engineer who lives life to its fullest. Gary Marmer
Response:
Jared: I meant "knowing that I have TS". My whole being and personality have developed around my TS, and I think that if all my tics, OCD, ADHD etc. dissapeared overnight, I might actually miss it. This is hard to explain, particularly following an episode of tics that leaves me with a sore neck, for example. I know many people with TS that are very successful and function very well in society, despite TS. Yes, I would still have children. Gary Marmer
Response:
In <Pine.PMDF.3.91.960116195915.539092244A-100000-100…@ttacs.ttu.edu> – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -z4…@ttacs.ttu.edu writes: >Wow, tough question…..I have TS, am 20 and in college, and honestly >don’t know if I’ll have kids or not. I’d like to in a bout 10 or so years >maybe but would I want my kids to have TS? >On the one hand, there are many god qualities to having Tourette >Syndrome….such as increased awareness of othere and yourself, a greater >understanding of other points of view, etc, etc,..and sometimes it can be >very hilarious. >Of course, there are also all of the drawbacks…..but personally, I >thinkd that when you consider all of the potentially icky stuff parents >can pass on to their children such as AIDS, or a genetic ailment that is >fatal. ANd of all the things parents have been known to do tho their >kids, ie: abuse, alienation, abandonment. Well, if passing Tourette >Syndrome on to your child is the worst thing you ever "do" to them, then >you’ve done a fantastic job. >So, I’d think about your own experiences with TS, and just weigh them >against all of the stuff that could have happened. And as for your Dad’s >attitude, I feel sorry for him…..and hope he isn’t feeling guilty >himself and eventualy wakes up and realizes that TS is not something best >dealt with by being ignored! >Jennifer Deery >Z4…@ttacs.ttu.ecu
Jennifer, Thank you for the positive message. I had not looked at some of issues of TS the way you presented it.
Response:
I find it very interesting that in my family, my mother (from whose family we can trace our TS) is much more sympethetic to tourettic episodes. More than anything, however, it is unfortunate. My sister who is struggling with her newfound "problems" can’t turn to her father for support, for it is he who looks at her disapprovingly after she manifests TS or OCD. My question, then is whether such behavior is common. Is it harder for the the non TS parent to accept his/her children than the TS parent? Chaim Shapiro
Response:
Dear Chaim, My father is similiar. He won’t accept the fact that I was d diagnosed with TS. Recently, I called him to tell him that my neurologist told me there is a 50% chance of passing TS on to a baby of mine. "It couldn’t possibly be that high, that must be wrong". he said. See the denial? Parents perhaps have a hard time accepting that there is anything wrong with their children. Did you recently write a note here asking if you should have kids? I am struggling with that question. What do you think? My case is very mild. Can it be more severe in a child? No one has written back to me(boo, hoo)) and I would like to make an informed family planning decision Love, Leiba Flanzer
Response:
U> I find it very interesting that in my family, my mother (from U>whose family we can trace our TS) is much more sympethetic to tourettic U>episodes. U> More than anything, however, it is unfortunate. My sister who is U>struggling with her newfound "problems" can’t turn to her father for U>support, for it is he who looks at her disapprovingly after she manifests U>TS or OCD. U> My question, then is whether such behavior is common. Is it U>harder for the the non TS parent to accept his/her children than the TS U>parent? U>Chaim Shapiro I don’t know if generalizations like that can be made. My husband’s TS could probably be traced to his mother (some OCD there), but she rejected his TS and punished him for it, while his father was more sympathetic. Karen karen.rez…@idealink.washington.dc.us Resist militant "normality" — A mind is a terrible thing to erase. —
